This is my father in 2010 at my daughter's wedding in Baltimore. He was eighty-three.
I remember that weekend--yes, because my daughter was getting married--but also because in the midst of all that joy, there was also sadness. Before the wedding, I recall walking across a bridge with my father and all seemed fine, but then I noticed a strange expression on Papa Callan's face. He stopped. His face went white. I asked if he was in pain. He said no. But he didn't have the strength to walk any further. We waited a while, and then we continued on our way.
Some fourteen years later, I learned from his cardiologist that he had congestive heart failure. And then, five months later, he was gone.
I look back now and realize that the seed of his demise was there on that day of my daughter's wedding. Mixed in with the heartfelt vows, the speeches, the laughter, the dancing, the bouquet flying across the hotel ballroom and finally the tearful goodbyes as the happy couple rode away on a bicycle built for two--such a charming cinematic moment. But yes, in the middle of all that joy--there was the silent seed of something else.
And that something else was the passing of a generation.
Truth is--the seed of our own demise is nestled inside of us from the day we are born. Everything is already there--the growing up, the falling down, the scraping of knees, the first kiss, the first heartbreak, the lessons learned--all the greeting and goodbyes, the trials and the tribulations. It's all there.
Creative Friends--I do not say this to make you sad. Rather, I say this as a call to action. Time's a ticking.
Take that trip around the world. Learn to sew. Design your own dress. Take up canoeing. Eat that chocolate chip cookie. Dance naked in the rain. Laugh as often as you can. Don't hold back.
And say thank you, I love you. Say it over and over again. Don't be embarrassed--because before you shuffle off this mortal coil and take your final bow—if you’re honest—isn't that what you really want to say? Heart open, fully present in the moment. Thank you. I love you. I know that's what I want to say. And I bet you do too.
Why not start now?
Thank you. I love you,
Jamie