Happy Mother's Day!

 

This is my favorite photograph of my mother. Not because of her fabulous legs--although you must admit she had some gorgeous gams--and not because of her pouty expression, her obvious snarkiness.

Actually, maybe this is my favorite photograph of my mother because of that snarkiness.

My mother was by no means a perfect mother. In fact, she was a deeply imperfect mother.

For a long time, the world has held fast to the myth of the perfect mother. The motherly mother. The all-sacrificing mother who doesn’t think of anyone else’s needs other than the needs of her children?

Heaven forbade she should have ambitions of her own. Or that she has dreams of being on Broadway. Or that she wants to dance across the kitchen linoleum, rather than make dinner!

I’m not saying that mothers who neglect their children are good mothers, but shall we give them some grace? It’s not easy being a mother. Most mothers are just thrown into the job without really having a clue about what is truly expected of them. No mother can truly know what to expect when they’re expecting. Every child is a unique human being with completely unique needs. There’s a lot of mystery to the matchmaking process of mother and child. And on top of this, not everyone is naturally equipped to take on the role.

So, on this Mother’s Day, let’s not just celebrate those perfect mothers--the ones that only exist in our imagination, but rather, let’s celebrate all the mothers in their wild variety and multitude of imperfections. Let’s celebrate them for their missteps as well as for their successes. Let’s appreciate their complexities, their unique person-hood, their dreams, their humanity.

And let’s just love them.

Happy Mother’s Day to everyone--the mother-mothers, the friends who mother, the cat-mothers, the golden retriever mothers, the mothers who make you laugh, the mothers who comfort you when you’re down and the mothers who occasionally forget to make dinner because they’re busy with their Broadway dreams.

Love,

Jamie